The Self Confidence Dilemma of The 21st Century

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Self confidence, self worth, self esteem, self respect… we have all seen these words in nice wall art at your local Target or Burlington with phrases like “Know your self worth,” or “self confidence is the best outfit” and the list goes on. Admit it. You have one of these some where in your room. We all love them but, what do they really mean?

Today we have seen self confidence, self esteem and all the other synonyms for these phrases portrayed in many forms. We have seen self confidence depicted in Instagram as someone walking in a bikini despite their weight or image, we have seen self esteem as our friend who goes out to a bar by themselves or someone who accepts their errors and moves on. We have seen self respect both as our fit guru friend who takes care of their health, and goes to the gym and as our coworker who accepts all their flaws and moves on. Some people say high self esteem is being able to sleep with men and/or women and easily move on while others believe self worth is waiting to find the special person before moving to the bedroom. So which one is it?


Today we can no longer box in the definition of self confidence to just one example because thanks (or maybe not) to social media and other outside influences we no longer have just one influence influencing our decision of what self confidence (and all of it’s synonyms and carriers names) is. We live in a world where we have to grab all of these influences, like social media, culture, friends, movements, values, morals etc and process them and decide for ourselves what we want this “self confidence” definition to be for us. Figuring this out will include experimenting and seeing what, you as a person, like, dislike, care about and don’t care about.

Finding this definition for the art painting you have in your house on self confidence consist of finding out who you are. So, next time you go to Ross or Burlington and buy motivational wall art, ask yourself, what does this mean to me? You may be surprised with your response or you may not have a response and realize you may need to go create one.

Contributor writer for Medium and former contributor writer for HuffPost. I focus on disparities in education and medicine. #Latina #Hispana #Medicine

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